With a title like that you might expect me to bash ID and Creationism, maybe later; no, it has more to do with parenting weighing heavily on my mind over the last several months. My thinking has been very egocentric up to this point flitting about how it would effect my lifestyle how I can make adjustments to it but it has given way to a line of thought of how could I give the best of myself while remembering the worst as a cautionary tale. A good friend of mine recently said that change in the world comes one child at a time. That the child is more than a summation of genes, it is a synthesis of experiences and as a parent it is up to you to assist in shaping that process.

My friend’s statement got me thinking about a Communications 220 class I took in college about the decision making process which outlined it as moving from least to greatest resistance. Because I can never pass up an opportunity to draw a diagram (thanks, Dad) here is my best recollection of the gradient (Easter colors to boot):

Like an onion, each layer is shaped by the one below it. Assumptions are formed on the foundation of attitude, attitude guided by values, and values are shaped by belief. In the case of decision-making, changes occur most often at the top two layers with assumptions and attitudes being informed by beliefs and values but altered through experience. Changes can filter down to the core but the experience needs to be substantial to enact a change to one’s underlying view of the world.

Where am I going with this exercise? I got to thinking how the process of raising a child is often the reverse. Parenting shapes the belief and value system of the child and thus informing their initial attitudes and assumptions, it works outward rather than inward as the goal is to provide guidelines. After that it is up to the child to continue growing and informing themselves but the result is something unique to that person. People for the most part should see themselves evolve over time as experience is accrued, granted their are exceptions to the rule but for the most part the act of living life changes the way one sees the world and what was passed to you from the people that raised you shapes that vision.

It gives me pause to try and think of what beliefs and values I was instilled with and how they have evolved over my life. I’m at a loss to fully describe them and that might be that they are more akin to strongly held emotions rather than rational and logical constructs. Being self-informed has always been important to be, “an unexamined life not worth living” sort of thing.  So what might I be passing on to my child?  Another thing to keep me awake at night.